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Hoax emails - why? And how to stop them.

It takes education, my friends. Teach your silly Luddite associates how to discern a hoax virus email, by replying (to "All") with the following:-

WATCH OUT, EVERYONE!!!

Please read and be on the lookout for such an email. Thanks

Please be warned, there is a dangerous viral hoax email about to be sent out to thousands of computer users around the world, designed by bored nerds who couldn't write a virus if they wanted to. The aim is to wipe out Sector zero of your brain, kill your parrot and make your microwave explode. It may possibly turn your "significant other" gay.

The brilliant thing about this viral hoax is that it is spread by gullible people, and NO ANTI-VIRUS SOFTWARE in the world can stop it. The extensive use of CAPITAL LETTERS and exclamation marks!!!!, bad punctuation, speling mistaeks and strange colours is a dead giveaway.

This has been verified by external hoax companies who shall remain nameless. I could tell you, but then I'd have to... never mind.

I have personally checked with Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Linus Torvalds and Richard Stallman, and they all agree this is the worst waste of time EVER!!!! Even the Dalai Lama is annoyed.

Please DON'T forward this warning to any of your FRIENDS, FAMILY AND CONTACTS. Anyone with any savvy will think you are an idiot, and the rest of them will unplug their computers and suck their thumbs, waiting for the END OF THE WORLD.

It has been confirmed by Vircheck, Antivir, Morphos Galorphus and Andrew Norton, and IT IS REAL. Really, really real. And of course Microsoft, who know all about viruses and would hate for you to do something sensible like switch to Firefox. According to Webinfo, if you add up all the time wasted by hoax emails it will amount to one entire long weekend for each person on planet Earth. If they were all printed out they would reach to Proxima Centauri and halfway back. So don't do it. Don't click that "Forward" button. Just don't do it. Not even "just in case".

Don't.


Jonathan H Pienaar

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(Saved to ~/docs/templates for next time.)

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